The Scribe

An Apex Warriors Publication

Home
About
Community Post
Blog
Contact

Right Where You Should Be

by | Jul 8, 2024

Did you know that every challenge you face holds a hidden opportunity for growth? Whether you’re stuck at a dead-end job or sleeping on your Auntie’s couch, these situations are brimming with potential for personal development. Let me share how you can turn these experiences into powerful stepping stones on your journey to self-improvement.

 

The Higher Perspective

In such circumstances, when you choose to elevate to a higher perspective, a bird’s eye view, the minimum you will find is that you are becoming very aware of what you DO NOT want to experience in your life. Been in that spot for a long time?  You’re letting the discomfort build up, pushing you toward what you DO WANT to experience in life. Discomfort and desperation – the great motivators of our time.

On the other hand, some circumstances serve a more practical purpose. For example, you can’t fulfill that lifelong dream of being a neurosurgeon without going to school. In my many years of hyper-fixation on self-healing and personal development, I’ve come to realize that every single instance of life has something to offer for the development of the story of who you are.

Alan Watts once said, “The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge 

Turning Challenges into Opportunities for Personal Growth

into it, move with it, and join the dance.” This perspective encourages us to embrace our current situations, however challenging they may be, as integral parts of our life’s journey.

Now, that’s not to say I am perfectly receptive to every lesson life offers through its misadventures. A favorite lyrical quote of mine simply states, ‘I’m only human, I don’t always rise above.’ To further build on that sentiment – we’re not always meant to. There is an equal opportunity to learn things outside of always choosing a higher perspective. If we walk around constantly refusing to be at least a little human, why did we bother stopping in on planet Earth?

In a mechanism not entirely understood by myself (but why ‘look a gift horse in the mouth’?), I have found that setting my ego aside long enough to consider the higher perspective, the ‘What can I learn/how can I grow from this?’ view, gives me measures of peace, patience, and perseverance I had at one time never known.

Recognizing the Struggle

When life gets tough, it’s crucial not just to push through but to acknowledge the signs of burnout and take deliberate action to reclaim balance. Burnout isn’t just about work; it encompasses emotional, mental, and physical exhaustion. We all have moments when we operate on autopilot, surviving on coffee and sheer willpower. I can’t drink 4 pots of coffee by myself in a day like I did as a 20-something java-freak, but I’ve certainly been hitting almost a 12 cup pot each day, drinking it late into the evening and neglecting water. I’ve bounced between convenience foods and the met the dawn before giving into sleep, dragging myself through daily demands with urgency.

I won’t lie and say this lifestyle isn’t sustainable. Most traditional advice would in fact say that this is unsustainable. You can absolutely live this way. These storms can become phases, can become moods, can become personalities. The real reason why it is important for us to spot ourselves in this mode of operation and do something about it is that it will put you on a path that takes you somewhere far from who you aspire to be.

It’s a slow descent into a low standard of living, an acceptance that life is bleak, draining and unfulfilling. It is detrimental to the person each of us picture ourselves to be. It is in direct opposition to the life we desire for ourselves. While at times we are required to temporarily reprioritize to meet the demands of life, neglecting the needs of your mind, body and spirit for too long will lead you down this path.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If you find yourself skipping meals, developing an allergy to water, running after the clock, and constantly berating yourself, you might be burning out. You’re likely halfway through the candle wick or more. Recognizing when the pressure starts to crack our foundations is crucial. Once it has been brought into the direct view of our awareness, developing and employing strategy to navigate through the storm is our hope for emerging from the battle minimally damaged and ready to continue moving forward through life.

TRIAGE

Stopping the flow of survival to understand what’s wrong can feel abrupt or frivolous, especially when deadlines loom. However, we can’t fix what we don’t know is broken. Without attention, what is broken will only deteriorate further. Here’s my apprach:

 

Assess Your Standards

List the foundational aspects of your life that aren’t meeting your chosen standard. Focus on simple, actionable items rather than idealistic goals.

Compare Standards to Reality

Evaluate your current reality against your chosen standard. For instance:

  • Sleep Cycle: I used to aim for a 10:00 PM – 6:00 AM sleep cycle. Now, I sleep irregularly, from 1:30 AM to 4:30 AM, often missing my alarm and waking late.
  • Morning Routine: I miss the morning entirely and start my day late, often scrambling to get ready.
  • Work Schedule: My grogginess in the morning affects my productivity, and I struggle with deadlines.
  • Diet: My diet has shifted to convenience foods, neglecting my nutritional needs.
  • Hydration: I sometimes go without water for a day.
  • Caffeine: My coffee consumption is excessive, with no clear cut-off time.
  • Connections: I’ve missed important events and have had minimal contact with loved ones.
  • Spiritual Practices: I’ve neglected meditation and journaling.
  • Chores: My home is cluttered and untidy, affecting my mental space.
  • Entertainment and Nature: I’ve had little time for leisure activities and nature.

    Create Immediate Actions

    • Based on the comparison, identify steps to return to your chosen standard:
    • Sleep: Set a hard bedtime of 10:00 PM and wake-up alarm of 7:00 AM. Use a sunlight alarm clock to help regulate wake-up time.
    • Morning Routine: Prepare everything needed for the day the night before. Set up a peaceful morning routine.
    • Work Schedule: Start work with a coffee in hand by 7:50 AM. Use the first 10 minutes to prioritize tasks and manage distractions.
    • Diet: Plan and prep meals in advance. Opt for quick, simple, nutritious options.
    • Hydration: Eliminate other beverages and focus on drinking water. Add natural flavors if needed.
    • Caffeine: Limit to a maximum of three cups a day with a cut-off time of 2:30 PM. Use reminders to manage intake.
    • Connections: Allocate time on weekends to connect meaningfully with loved ones.
    • Spiritual Practices: Integrate journaling, meditation, and ceremonial practices back into my routine – even if just for a few minutes a day or a few days a week.
    • Chores: Define essential chores, delegate where possible, and establish a manageable, minimum routine.
    • Entertainment and Nature: Schedule time for leisure activities and connect with nature regularly.

    Acknowledging What Can Be Put Off

    During challenging times, it’s important to recognize that some aspects of our lives can be put off temporarily. Not everything requires immediate attention. Prioritize critical areas that need urgent focus, and allow yourself to defer less essential tasks until life starts to ease up. This approach helps prevent overwhelm and allows you to maintain balance while working through your battles.
    By making these adjustments and understanding what can be postponed, you can begin to restore balance and navigate through the storm with renewed clarity and purpose. Embrace the process of returning to your chosen standards and allow yourself to grow through these challenging times.

     Practice

    Take a moment to complete a Personal Resilience Inventory. We prepared a form for you for an easy download – but you can design your own using the following guidelines to customize the inventory to your specific needs:

    Assess Your Life: Rate the following categories from 1 (poor) to 10 (excellent):

    Sleep Quality, Nutrition, Work-Life Balance, Emotional Well-being, Relationships

    Identify Weak Areas: Find which categories have the lowest ratings.

    Set Goals: For each weak area, define one or two specific, actionable goals (e.g., establish a bedtime routine if Sleep Quality is low).

    Create an Action Plan: Outline steps to achieve these goals with short-term and long-term strategies.

    Reflect and Adjust: Review your progress weekly, adjust goals as needed, and note improvements and challenges.

     

     

     

    Journal Prompts

    • Reflect on a recent period where you felt overwhelmed and disconnected due to external demands or personal struggles. What specific actions or patterns contributed to this feeling? How can you adjust your daily routine to better manage these demands while maintaining your well-being?

    • Identify areas of your life where you’ve been neglecting self-care due to pressing responsibilities or stress. What are the immediate, actionable steps you can take to restore balance in these areas? How will implementing these steps impact your overall sense of stability and health?

    • Consider the energy you’ve expended during a recent period of intense stress. Which activities or habits have been depleting your resources the most? Create a plan to gradually reintroduce practices that will help replenish your energy, and outline how you will monitor your progress in this process.

     

    If you found these journal prompts to be helpful, check out our growing list of journal prompts in the community resource library!

    Check Out The Libary!